Hard Time

Diseases & Conditions Depression
1
 well im having a bit of a hard time with things i actualy whanted to come here to help plp but i guese ill be the one getting help and needing it badly see lately alot of stuff has been going on my dad has a problem with his neck and i hafto help him around which is hurting my neck and body. my firned kayla which has Crohn's is getting worse and might need part of her intestines taken out and since thats happening her bf my best friend is so worried about her. the my friend Ali is in a gang has had sex before 12 and is doing weed. my grandmother and uncle are going blind and have a desease when you lose your memory. and thru all this we have money problems and my past is always kreeping up behind me. see i usto do drugs and also cut myself i just dont whant to start eny of it again. this past week i just stared at sicors or a knife for like and hour so thing or going tuff ive had plp cry on me all week but its like impossible for me to cryi whanted to cry with them but i couldnt it sucks yah know? i dont usualy tell plp about my problems i keep them inside  but its not doing eny good  ive been trying to just put a fake smile on but even my fahter said to me wow you look like a walking gohst(my father can be a jerk) but im hanging in

Life is not measured by the breaths we take, but the times that take our breath away

2
Hi Washi,
I can understand where you are coming from. It seems like everything is happening all at once. It seems like the bad luck never stops and I can totally relate to you on that.But please try to refrain from hurting yourself. We want you with us for a long time. I know it might feel tempting but maybe you should go out and buy a punching bag and use that and see if it helps. I know I am not the one who should be talking because I always go out and get drunk when I have problems . But I am here if you need me just let me know.
Hugs,
Depresedandlonly
3
I am sorry you are having such a hard time. I also have a history of hurting myself. I carry around a list of questions and a help list to try and keep myself from doing it. Here my two lists:
 
1. Take a walk
2. Take an ice cold bath
3. Chat online or message board
4. Deep breathing
5. say to myself "I deeply and completely accept myself even though I hurt myself" (several times)
6. Squeeze Ice cube
7. Call someone
8. Snap wrist with rubber band
9. Curl up in bed (comfort zone)
 
Questions I ask myself
1. Why do I feel the need to hurt myself?
2. Have I been here before?
3. What have I done to ease discomfort?
4. How do I feel right now?
5. How will I feel when I am hurting myself?
6. How will I feel after I hurt myself?
7. Can I avoud the stressors or deal with them better in the future?
8. D I need to hurt myself?
 
Sometimes these help me, maybe they can help you. I know how hard it is - I deal with it alot. I try and think how people who care about me don't want me to hurt myself.
 
 
4
Hi Washi, it sounds like you have put alot of thought and care into tallying up a list of all the bad things in your life. Have you put that much care into the list of all the good things? All these people you are focussing on with problems, what are some of the reasons you love them, what are the positive aspects, make that list up, I would love to see it, it would help me. I think you need attention as does everyone, maybe the important people to you in your life, aren't available for you when you hurt and need. This is why it is most important to be there for yourself, and not mangled but in tact. You want to hurt yourself? Excersize until it burns while listening to your favorite music, maybe the emotional and mental crap won't be screaming so loud in your head when you are done. If and or when your mind is clouding up with this negative fog, MAKE yourself pray, over and over if that's what it takes. LIVE! I used to complain about my old hat until I met a man with no head. I want to see your new list. God be with you my young sister. Peace