HUGS,
Ginny
Hi Tracy,
I'm from the lupus and MS forums. I saw this post and just had to respond. I hope you don't mind. I'm so sorry you lost your grandma. (((((Hugs)))) My mom passed away almost 2 years ago with colon cancer. Of course I was devistated, but my daughter was 20 at the time and it really effected her. She was away at college and didn't get to spend much time with her in the end. They were very close!!
My mom was dx with cancer in june of 2003 and passed away in sept of 2003. When she was dx, she and my father moved in with me and my husband and we took care of her for the last 3 months of her life. We had alot of time to talk and share in the memories of the past, but my daughter didn't have that time with her. She was able to see her a day or two here and there, but she was very upset that she couldn't spend more time with her and like you, she wanted her to be at her wedding also, but she wasn't even involved with anyone and still isn't.
I just want to let you know that my daughter and I talk about my mom alot. We talk about the good times we all had together, places we went, talks we all had, the funny things that my mom had done. She was a very funny lady!!
I know this is very hard for you and you are greiving now, but try to think about the good times and cherish the memories you have of your grandmother. I know she will always be in your heart and you will think of her often, especially when you are doing or saying something that reminds you of her. Remember she is in heaven and not sick anymore. I'm sure she is watching over you.
My daughter says she talks to her alot at night when she goes to bed. I do that as well. Even though she isn't talking back to us, this is our way of letting her know we love her and she is still with us.
Here's a big *hug* from me!! Take your time and let yourself greive, then keep her in your heart always. Take care and God Bless You!!! You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Love, Babs
Diagnosis: Lupus and Restless leg syndrome 1990, RA and Fibro 1994, Sjoren's and Raynaud's 1995, Diverticulitis 1998, Seizures April, 2005
JOB 5:18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.
I'm from the Crohn's forum but ran across your post. Be comforted in the fact she didn't suffer and is now in God's hands. ((((Hugs))))
Thoughts and prayers are with you and your family,
-- Henri-Frédéric Amiel (1821-81), Swiss philosopher, poet
Babs, your post hits home. My grandmother has been in Fla the past ten 14 years. 10 years ago my grandfather died. As you can see, I am on the epilepsy forum. I had my first grand mal after a plane trip. I didn't go to fla to see her. I feel bad about it, but my parents told me I was better off not seeing her in the condition she was in. I feel very deep sad pain. Things I wish I could have done and said. I can't and that is just that. But I had been talking to her at night, even though she was alive and couldn't talk on the phone. Thank you so much for your post. Your daughter sounds like she experienced what I am going threw.
Jen thanks for your post! I will probably be taking you up on that email.
Jon, thank you for posting. It is so nice to know that there are so many good people in this world that will stop by, say hello and lift you up without even knowing you.
She had been out of it the past week from all of the morphine. She was only in the hospice hosptial for about 4 days. I know she is with my grandfather now and watching over us.
THanks again!
I'm a mod on the fibromyalgia forum and found your post while cruzing. I'm so sorry you lost your grandma! (((((Tracy))))) I know how you must fee. My dad died from cancer 3 years ago and I miss him terribly.
When it first happened I was just out of it. So lost, sad, and frustrated that he wasn't here any more. After a few weeks I was able to start think about the good...not the fact that he was gone. Ya, I went through a time of mourning...it's natural and right. But after a while I started thinking about my dad and what he would think of me spending hours on end crying because he wasn't here. He would be happier in Heaven if I put my energy to better use.
It took a while but I started to think of the possitive, not the negative. Dad wouldn't want me dwelling on the fact that he was gone. It was hard but I turned my thinking around. I was able to talk about the fun times and how proud dad was of his kids and grandkids. How he was such a great fisherman. And how much he loved my mother. It helped my mom get on with her live more easily since I was trying to be positive.
Tracy, I truly understand loss. I lost my 23 year-old son a few years ago. I thought I just couldn't go on. It took quite a while, but I was finally able to push on thanks to a wonderful doctor and family. Take your time getting used to life how it is now. For now, just focus on the funeral, then take what comes next. One day at a time. Things will get better. If you are still having trouble after a few months then don't hesitate talking to your doctor about it. I should have done that sooner than I did.
Anyway, I've rambled on long enough. Take good care of yourself! You have a lot of friends here who care deeply about you!
Hugs,
Chutz
Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.
Mark Twain (1835 - 1910)
Check out HW gear at: http://www.healingwell.com/shop/
Thank you for you deep heartfelt post. I am very sad right now and I wish to write more, but just can't. Not right now anyway. I want to say thank you for sharing with me. I know this all helps me. This forum has been a life saver and I thank you for taking the time out to write to me. I appreciate it so much. Tracy
Tracy,
I am from the cardiovascular and allergy forum and I just saw your post.
I am truly sorry for the loss of your Grandmother, Tracy. It is very hard to lose anyone that we are close to. I just lost both of my parents this past year, so I know that feeling of loss and sadness. Just remember though, you will always carry a part of her, her memory, with you for the rest of your life. And with that memory she will live on.
Hugs, Teri
"Because he is he and I am I."......E. V. Lucas
"I Hope You Dance".............LeeAnn Womack
(((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))
Mel-Fibro Forum Mod
I'm so sorry about your Grandma. She sounds like someone really special in your life. She would be so proud of everything you've accomplished and WILL accomplish.
Hope you have some time you can be with your family. Extra Hugs to You!
((((((((((((((Tracy))))))))))))))
Glenda
complex partial seizures since 22
Hi Tracy,
It's good to hear from you. I'm glad your family will be coming in soon to be there with you. You all need each other right now. Sunday will be a hard day for you. The funeral is the hard part to get through. That was when I really broke down and let the tears roll, but it seemed to help me to get it out.
I'm glad your job is so good to you and understanding. It was nice of them to send a nice flower basket. Sending you "Big warm hugs"!! I will be thinking about you on Sunday and you will be in my prayers. God Bless You!!!
Love, Babs
Diagnosis: Lupus and Restless leg syndrome 1990, RA and Fibro 1994, Sjoren's and Raynaud's 1995, Diverticulitis 1998, Seizures April, 2005
JOB 5:18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.
Tracy,I don't know you but noticed your post... I'm so sorry for yours and your family's loss. Death is such a smack in the head. Seems as though we all go through our lives blithely (is that a word?) pretending that this will never end and then, "Poof!", we lose someone we love and there are no words for it.
Babs is right about the crying... let the tears roll. And in the days, weeks and months ahead let them come again when you need to. Don't know if this will help you or not because it's scientific, not emotional... but research has shown that the 'sad' enzyme that we have in our brain chemistry takes a long time to break down through natural detoxification by the liver. The good thing is that our bodies can excrete this 'sad' enzyme very quickly through tears. Researchers have actually measured the levels in human tears and applied it to their work.
Sooooooo... now that you know why you will feel better after a good cry so go ahead and let it go. You will be able to cope better and more quickly and be of more help to your family, also. Your grandma was very lucky to have such a wonderful and caring granddaughter like you. She is still with you, you just can't see her right now. Wish I could take away your hurt...
Jeannie143
The funeral is tomorrow. I am very scared about the funeral. Nervous I will faint or have a seizure. Just talking aloud to my friends makes me lightheaded. Well I have been talking to grandma outloud the past few days. I hope she hears me. Thanks for all o fyour support, Tracy
I am very nervous about tomorrow. I really don't want to have a seizure or faint or anything. With the heat and humidity, emotions and crying it is a risky day for me. I hope I will get threw it okay. I will keep yall updated. Keep posting to me everyone, it makes me feel so much better. This HW is the true meaning of "support" group,
Tracy
Hi Tracy,
I know tomorrow will be hard for you, but you will have your family there with you. I pray that you don't have a seizure tomorrow. Stay near a family member or friend that you are very close to, that will give you comfort.
I'm sure your grandma hears you talking to her and she is looking down you on. Know that she is no longer is in pain and in a good place now. I hope you get some sleep tonight and you will be in my thoughts and prayers tomorrow. God Bless You!! (((((((hugs)))))))) You can do this!!!
Love, Babs
Diagnosis: Lupus and Restless leg syndrome 1990, RA and Fibro 1994, Sjoren's and Raynaud's 1995, Diverticulitis 1998, Seizures April, 2005
JOB 5:18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.
(((tracy)))
Ginny
Tracy,
Just wanted to send you some ((((((hugs))))) today!!! Your in my thoughts and prayers.
Love, Babs
Diagnosis: Lupus and Restless leg syndrome 1990, RA and Fibro 1994, Sjoren's and Raynaud's 1995, Diverticulitis 1998, Seizures April, 2005
JOB 5:18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.
Tracy,
I hope the funeral wasn't a big stress on you and you didn't have any health problems. (((((((hugs)))))) to you and when you feel up to it, let us know how it went. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love, Babs
Diagnosis: Lupus and Restless leg syndrome 1990, RA and Fibro 1994, Sjoren's and Raynaud's 1995, Diverticulitis 1998, Seizures April, 2005
JOB 5:18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.