Never thought that I would be posting this..................(m)

Desertdreaming · October 3, 2004, 11:52pm

this past week my mom-in-law and my sister's sister-in-law were diagnosed with breast cancer. Can you believe this crap? My Mom-in-law is severly overweight. 300+ ... so surgery is out of the question since she has heart problems. She has known about this for a couple of months now but we just found out this past week. She will not do chemo because she watched Tony's father die from leukemia. So... not looking good. She is going the Susan Somer's route. All herbal products. She is a Cherokee Indian and several medicine men are praying for her. Hopefully the mass will shrink.

claramels2 · October 4, 2004, 1:48am

Oh Annette, I'm so sorry. What a lousy week. I will keep your mom-in-law and sister's sister-in-law in my prayers. Holding you tight, Libby

Friends are God's way of taking really good care of us.

Desertdreaming · October 4, 2004, 1:55am

Thank you... and thank you for the post card. I meant to post about that and ..... no excuse comes to mind so it was bad manners on my part. It made me chuckle and the card made me long for the desert that I consider my home.

Annette

jessiecat · October 4, 2004, 2:01am

Dear Annette,

I am so so sorry and so friggin mad too.

This dam disease just WON'T QUIT!

And for you to get this news about two members of your family at the same time? I feel really bad for your family and for YOU because it must be freaking you out at the same time it is making you be concerned and worried for them.

I am praying that they both might listen to you or their doctors and do EVERYTHING in their power to fight this BEAST.

I am really sorry Annette.

Boy- reading this makes me love even more the closing lines you have after each of your posts- truer words have never been spoken. Take back all the pink ribbons- here's "our" month back- just give us a friggin cure already. ENOUGH.

Love,

Jessie

ardee · October 4, 2004, 2:33am

Dear Annette,

This is horrible! How awful to have to worry about one member of the family, but two at once? This is such a cruel disease. Please take care of yourself. The emotional stress can be overwhelming. I'll keep all three of you in my prayers.

L&H,
Rita

MNlady13 · October 4, 2004, 5:16am

Oh, Annette, I am so sorry. You must feel like you were kicked in the gut. Two family members at one time?!? That's just too much. I also am sorry that your MIL is turning her back on chemo. I would think that in this situation it would be the best treatment route. I just can't find the right words for you. ending comforting hugs, Lauri

"Go confidently into the direction of your dreams. Live the life you always imagined" Thoreau

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

Ynkefan31 · October 4, 2004, 10:06am

Annette, I am so sorry that your MIL and SIL were both diagnosed. Will keep you all in my prayers.

-§»§«:*´`³¤³´`*:» Vicky §«:*´`³¤³´`*:»§«§-

Cathi · October 4, 2004, 11:00am

Geez Annette..I am so sorry..this disease just never stops and I am so sick of it. I am hoping and praying that they both do well.

Love ya

Cathi

Sometimes it is a slender thread, Sometimes a strong,

stout rope; She clings to one end, I the other;

She calls it friendship; I call it hope....

Luci · October 4, 2004, 2:13pm

(((Annette, Annette))), I am so sorry to read this news. Come here often and pour out your heart. I'm praying hard for everyone. Love, Luci

In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me lay an invincible summer. Albert Camus

gma · October 4, 2004, 6:22pm

Gees I thought I posted to this last night. Guess I forgot to hit submit. I am so sorry to hear about your mil and sister's sil. I suggested last night in the post that didn't make it, maybe mil could have a local biopsy with twilight sleep?????? Is that possible? The chemo would be hard on her heart, too. How old is she? Usually bc in older ladies is not as aggressive. Now about that younger lady, maybe after she settles down and realizes what the odds are and what she really could be facing, she will realize saving a breast is not quite as important as she first thought. I'm sure her doctor's will guide her in the right direction. Hopefully all will be handled properly. I know how upset it is making you, and I don't blame you for being upset. We need to get this darnable disease wiped out. Hugs, prayers and love, MK

barkyboys · October 5, 2004, 4:58am

Dear Annette...it just never stops, does it. Hugs to you.

Love,
BEV

DiVanDyke · October 6, 2004, 9:25pm

Annette, I was angry about cancer when I turned on the computer today and now I have smoke coming out of my ears. Somehow I just can't believe that this can't be stopped.
I will be praying for your family.
My sister in law's sister had it too when I had mine the first time. She is fine as far as my SIL knows. She doesn't talk about it at all. Not like us. Love, Di

songster · October 9, 2004, 4:58pm

Annette, That is just almost too much to take. Your S's SIL and your MIL deserve all the prayers they can get, as do you. I hope you can all look at as a source of mutual support and not get too much into who's fighting it which way. I knew from the beginning I'd take whatever measures necessary...my breasts had done their work nursing my child so I wasn't exactly happy to have them removed, but I'm not ready for heaven yet, either. Sounds like chemo sucks, but whatever it takes, I'll do. You sound like you're the same way, and I hope these two women you love come around to that conclusion as well. In the meantime, take good care of yourself. Love, Tracy

babyseeester · October 15, 2004, 5:34am

Hi! This is Kathy, Annette's sister's sister-in-law. I just joined the group. The reason I had the lumpectomy was because at that point, the doctor said the outcome would be the same. Now I know differently. They got good margins on the tumor, but the darn thing is growing along the blood vessels, which he's never seen before. I had (I think) 3 pos lymphs. I will be having a mastectomy of the right breast on 10/21. I am going to be very lopsided, because I'm large breasted. I am expecting chemo, but not sure about radiation. My tumor was quite large, too.

I am 44, married, no children, 2 cats, live outside of Los Angeles, with no immediate history of breast cancer. I look forward to communicating with all of you!

Tavish · October 15, 2004, 10:54am

Hi Kathy, welcome! We're glad Annette steered you here for support and jump in to any thread you want...

You can have a reduction of the other breast when you have the mast, there are laws that protect us and our rights for symmetry. Not that you would achieve symmetry, but to be much less lopsided and have an opportunity for a good match with a prosthesis or for reconstruction. You may want to inquire about that.

I had a lumpectomy at age 30, did chemo and rads and finishing up on Tamoxifen. For me, they said mast was the same as lumpectomy plus rads, just depends on the individual situation and tumor pathology.

Annette will be a great resource for you, and we'll try to fill in the gaps-
Lori

lemonz · October 15, 2004, 12:19pm

Hi Kathy, So sorry you have a reason to be here. I had the cancer choking the blood vessels and growing down the nerves in my arm. That was over 5 years ago. Does that make you feel a tiny bit better. I know I liked hearing from someone that had that five years ago. Hope it helps you. Hugs and good wishes, Joyce

People are like tea bags, you have to put them in hot water to see how strong they are!

jessiecat · October 15, 2004, 12:24pm

Hi Kathy,

I am glad you came here. ( i love your log-in name).

I remember when I had my lumpectomy one of the things that the BS told me was that he will have to wait to see whether the margins were clear or if there was vascular invasion in order to tell me whether it would stay a lumpectomy. It is a GOOD thing they found that. Now you will be 100% certain it is all removed.

And as always, Lori is right, you can have a reduction on the other side- and it is covered by insurance.

Take it one day at a time. Get through the surgery now and we'll help you deal with the chemo later.

I know it seems very overwhelming but this is all DOABLE and you will get through it!

Plus you have Annette! She's the greatest.

Jessie