Here is my general philosophy about MS.
I have MS. It certainly has left me significantly impaired...but then, I've had it for 23 years, now, long before any of the meds were available, and I had multiple serious exacerbations which disabled me.
But: there are a LOT of diseases worse than MS. ALS comes to mind. Cancer. Other life-threatening diseases.
I can either accept that I have MS, and go about living my life. Or I can't. If I can't -- then what are my choices? Complain about it, rail to the world, or to my "higher power", something like, "Woe is me! What did I do to deserve this??!! Why me???? I tried to live a good life!!" Drag down everyone around me with my depression, or my frantic search for "the cure" for an incurable (right now) disease.
Or I can accept that I have it, do the best I can to manage symptoms, take meds that show promise that they'll slow or stop exacerbations, and get on with my life. I can learn to work around the worst of it, accept that there will be things I cannot do, so look instead for the things I CAN do, and rejoice in them. I can learn to do old things in new ways, or let go of old things that I'd like to do but simply can't anymore. I grieve their loss...then move on. I lower my expectations about "the way life should be",
and rejoice if I wake up in the morning, happy that "life is". Already it's a good day. And maybe it will be better...or not. If it's better, then I accomplish some things, play with my furkids, cook a meal, or fix a special dessert for my husband. If it's not...I find a good book and a pot of tea and get out of my husband's way so he can manage to take care of his needs without me.
I don't like having to inject every other day...but I do it. Maybe it will continue to slow the disease. At best, maybe the fact that I've been on it this long without long-term complications will help doctors understand it's long-term benefits, and that information will help someone else. I follow research on new drugs, but am pretty sure I'm so impaired it won't make much difference for me. But maybe someone else newly diagnosed will benefit, and I'll rejoice.
While I do belong to a church - -Unitarian Universalist church -- I don't believe in a "higher power", or "life after death", or "once I get to heaven I will be healed" or any of that. I just live each day as best I can, try to do some good for someone each day, go to bed, and if I wake up, do it again.
Works for me.
...I am not a doctor, nor health professional, and don't pretend to be one, here.....
While we certainly miss you when you can't be here, I'm sure everyone understands when you can't be. I hope that your friend is doing well and I'm sure she truly appreciates you being there for her. I'll be thinking of you Monday when you visit your doctor and I hope that they will be able to do something to make you feel better. I've heard very good things about Zelnorm.
As for your other question, Mike has a few words for you in response:
Michelle,
I dont ever think about how my life was before MS because my life now is what it is. Me having MS really isn't about me but how it might help people around me, lessons they can learn or get from it. If new things happen that then just defines my life from that point on. I don't miss what I once had because I've already lived that part of my life. I hope that makes sense and helps you somehow.
Mike
I just wanted to let u know i hear u and care very much that u'r dealing with all that u'r dealing with. I hope u have a great week and appt on monday. As much as u'r doing to help others, don't forget about u'rself and all u need to make it. Take the time u need to care for u'rself and be as well as u can be. The others are right...u'r leading the way for so many others like me and u'r experience and knowledge is indeed priceless, especially when coupled with the care and prayers u also offer us. Take care of u'rself friend.
rhonda