Hey gang. I got a job!
I spoke with my social worker on Friday, b/c I've been going nuts, being stuck at home the last two weeks, and he said that I can work while on disability, I just can't bring in more than $1000. a month - which never happens anyway, b/c I never seem to be able to work that many hours. So, I re-typed my resume and cover letter, and headed out. I've worked visual merchandise for the last four years, retail for the last eight, so I headed in to the JC Penney's (that's where I worked in GA) and filled out an app. I went to hand in the app, and asked if I could leave my resume, and this guy behind me asked if he could see it. Turns out he was the ASM, and he took me straight back to the store manager, who hired me on the spot, and asked where in the store I would like to work.
I wanted to go back to visual, but there were no openings right now, and I think it would be too much for my body to handle quite yet, so I'm working in the Jr.s dept instead. It's a long way down the pole from being a manager, but I'm getting a little better at accepting where my limitations are at the moment. He said I could start out in Jr.s, and if I didn't like it, I could switch to any dept. I would like. Cool, huh?
One problem: I didn't get much of an opportunity to speak, and so I didn't tell them I have seizures. So my question to everyone is this: Should I? And if so, HOW? I want an opportunity to prove myself, but I'm still working with my doc on trying to get the seizures under control. Most of mine for tonic-clonic happen at night, but I have a lot of absence seizures during the day, and what I call "twitch and glitches" where I stutter over words, and my head and arms jerk on their own at weird times. It's been a long time since I've worked with customers, and I'm kind of nervous, b/c I don't want everyone in the store knowing, but I don't want to let them to suddenly find me on the floor one day and not know what's going on either.
Any advice? I'm supposed to start later this week.
~Heidi Hope~
~Heidi Hope~
"For I know the plans I have for you", says the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you Hope & a Future."
Jeremiah 29:11
I had my first day yesterday. Just a five hour shift, which was good, b/c I don't think I would have had the energy for anything longer. It felt really good though. A few frustrating moments with some teenage girls who work there and don't appreciate having a new girl who actually does her job, but hey, they're like 6-7 years younger than me and healthy - bring it on! :) Overall, it felt really good. I met a few nice workers, and a ton of managers kept coming over to introduce themselves. I didn't tell anyone about the seizures though. I wasn't sure who to tell and who not to, and I wanted to keep it as quiet as possible. But you know what, you're right. I don't have anything to worry about. I'm going to enjoy it, and do my best, and they can think what they want to think. It's not like I'm the first person who's worked for JC Penneys and had seizures. I hope this jobs just a temporary think, though, b/c it's going to get really boring, really soon. Plus, my career goal was never to clean out fitting rooms. On the bright side, as soon as I can get the seizures under control, I'll be able to go back to school, and that's the whole goal anyway.
Thanks for the encouragement! I'm going to talk to the managers tomorrow, if I can, or at least one of them.
~Heidi Hope~
Thanks for the encouragement! I'm going to talk to the managers tomorrow, if I can, or at least one of them.
~Heidi Hope~
"For I know the plans I have for you", says the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you Hope & a Future."
Jeremiah 29:11
Thanks, Mandi, you're so groovy! 
Okay, that's totally lame, but I'm in a good mood, and my quirky humor is coming out.
I was really worried about having to close tonight, b/c I was afraid I'd have one of my three guaranteed catamenial seizures (which always happen at night). But I ended up getting it out of the way yesterday (it was a waste of a perfectly good day, but I had friends with me, so I didn't mind too bad), so now I'm not too worried about it. I'm just happy to be able to get out of the house, and this weekends supposed to be really busy, and I love that. It gets my mind off everything else. I've been getting depressed off and on this week, b/c of going from being a full-time manager, with a fiance and a two year old son (my fiance's), to being a peon at the bottom of the work food chain, only able to work 2-3 shifts a week, single, no longer a mommie, moved back home with no money, no car, no house, and my mom dealing with her third bout of cancer. Ugh! It's been a rough month! 
But things are looking up, and I know that this, too, shall pass. One day at a time. Are you doing better? I know you've been having it rough lately, as well. You've been in my thoughts a lot this week. You and Jennifer, actually, seen I haven't seen her post much this week.
Well, as they say in the South, "I'll holla' atcha later!" There's that quirky humor again! I gotta go to work.
~Heidi Hope~
"For I know the plans I have for you", says the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you Hope & a Future."
Jeremiah 29:11
Heidi,
I just wanted to congradulate you on your job. I'm happy for you!! You have been so nice to me in your posts. I admire your strength and courage through all that you are dealing with. You are a true inspiration to us all!!
Take care and I wish you the best of luck. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Babs
Diagnosis: Lupus and Restless leg syndrome 1990, RA, Asthma and Fibro 1994, Sjogren's and Raynaud's 1995, Diverticulitis 1998, Minor stroke 2004, Atherosclerosis 2004, Seizures march 2005
JOB 5:18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.
Please help Healingwell succeed in helping others. Any donations will be greatly appreciated.
Thanks Babs! I didn't mean to blab so much on this site, but it really helps. I worked last night until 11 pm. I didn't think I'd make it that long, but it went really well, and a lot of people were impressed by how hard I worked, which was really nice to hear, even though it was all easy stuff to do. I told the women's manager about having seizures, and she was really good about it. She called the loss prevention manager over, and guess what? He has a mild form of epilepsy, and takes Depakote and Lamictal! He let me know that if I ever had a problem, I could page for the loss prevention team, and they would be able to help with whatever I needed. That way, I don't have to let anyone else know the details, but I don't have to worry about having a seizure at work. 
It's still been a bad seizure week. I was supposed to work tonight, but started having seizures again this morning - tonic-clonics, no less. Ugh, they make me hurt. I had a friend over again, but it was really annoying to have to deal with seizures instead of being able to go out and have fun with other friends. Plus, I was having a REALLY hard time breathing for some reason. I ended up calling my boss, and let her know I'd been having seizures throughout the day, and wasn't sure if they would let up in time for me to get ready for work and get out there. She told me not to worry about it; they had doubled up the schedule to begin with, and though she'd miss my hard work, it was okay, just get to feeling better. She scheduled me for thirty hours this coming week, and I'm going to try my hardest to work all of them. After this week though, she's just going to put me on for 15-20 hours until I can get the med levels where they need to be. That will be good, b/c it seems if I work five hours one day, I spend the majority of the next day sleeping, so maybe if I only have 2-3 shifts a week, I can get out of bed for something other than work. 
Anyway, just thought I'd update.
~Heidi Hope~
"For I know the plans I have for you", says the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you Hope & a Future."
Jeremiah 29:11
Heidi,
I'm glad you told your boss about the seizures and they have no problem with that. Now you don't have that stress to worry about.
I'm sorry to hear that this week has been a bad seizure week. I hope your meds do get leveled out soon and the decrease in hours helps you. I know you are drained from the seizures. (((Hugs)))
I agree that it helps to talk things out at HW. This place has really been a blessing to me. Keep us updated on your job and your seizure activity. Take care and you will be in my thoughts and prayers.
Babs
Diagnosis: Lupus and Restless leg syndrome 1990, RA, Asthma and Fibro 1994, Sjogren's and Raynaud's 1995, Diverticulitis 1998, Minor stroke 2004, Atherosclerosis 2004, Seizures march 2005
JOB 5:18 For he wounds, but he also binds up; he injures, but his hands also heal.
Please help Healingwell succeed in helping others. Any donations will be greatly appreciated.
I got scheduled for an 8 hour shift Sunday, and was feeling really lousy. They asked for volunteers to go home, so of course I jumped on that. I was feeling better later on, so I went to the movies with some friends, including the new guy I'm dating. I made it through the movie fine, but we got out into the lobby, and I got a REALLY strong aura. I couldn't get the words right out of my mouth, so I just walked off on my friends, to go to my friends jeep I had borrowed. My friends figured out what was going on, and followed me, but I ended up in the back of the jeep, going in and out of tonic-clonics for about twenty minutes, IN THE MALL PARKING LOT!!! 
It was so mortifying, b/c the whole Jeep was shaking. I'm going to make another appt. w/ my doc, and see if I can get re-started on the Keppra, and hopefully it won't make me keep losing weight.
I couldn't get the words right out of my mouth, so I just walked off on my friends, to go to my friends jeep I had borrowed. My friends figured out what was going on, and followed me, but I ended up in the back of the jeep, going in and out of tonic-clonics for about twenty minutes, IN THE MALL PARKING LOT!!! It was so mortifying, b/c the whole Jeep was shaking. I'm going to make another appt. w/ my doc, and see if I can get re-started on the Keppra, and hopefully it won't make me keep losing weight.
It's just frustrating, b/c I want to make the most of every day, and when I have a bad seizure day, it just seems like such a waste. But I know it'll get better. . . it always does, eventually.
~Heidi Hope~
~Heidi Hope~
"For I know the plans I have for you", says the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you Hope & a Future."
Jeremiah 29:11
I had my first seizure at work on Thursday. Mortifying, but everyone was really nice about. Too nice, actually, in that patronizing way. My heads been jerking a lot the past few days, and last night was the worst night I've had in over a month. What stinks is that my day was really good, and I tried to pace myself and not overdo it, but it was a bad night anyway. Stopped breathing on my boyfriend twice, which is the first time he's experienced that. Luckily stopped on my own after about 40 minutes, so I was able to avoid the whole ER trip thing. I went to my parents today, and had a small one. My dad was pretty good about it, but griped at me b/c I don't want to wear an ID bracelet. I have the medic alert thing on my keychain, but he said no one's going to look at my keychain while I'm writhing on the floor.
I'm really depressed about all of this, and the weird thing is that when I have a good day, I feel like crying, b/c I know it won't last. Usually I'm really good about keeping a positive attitude, but the last two weeks. . . let's just say I haven't been coping too well w/ it.
~Heidi Hope~
"For I know the plans I have for you", says the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you Hope & a Future."
Jeremiah 29:11