I have gone through my phone and texted all the Mothers I know and wished them a Happy Mother's Day...so if I don't hear from my kids I am still getting a lot of texts back from all the other Moms! It is FUN!
I am going out to buy myself some white lillies.
I am going to treat myself like a little girl who has a loving Mom today!
I am going to make it,a,great day and detach from all the chaos and troubled men in my life!
Oops gotta' go...more texts coming in!
I will create my own happiness today!!!
Went and bought myself a beautiful bouquet with roses, Lillie's and baby's breath. Crying now because I attached a note that said world's greatest mom love, my two sons. They probably won't call and hubby forgot. I will go and try to help a struggling bipolar friend with alcohol addiction. Gotta' get out of self-pity. Heeeeelllllppppp!
One of the buddist stories i like is the one about feeling better.
THe easiest way to feel better is to help others.
The more you help others and give of yourself
the more the universe will help you back.
THe other one is about finding happiness.
Find the happiness that no one can take from you
Then no matter how bad life becomes, you will
allways have a source of happiness no one can touch.
Helping a friend who is hurting is a wonderful thing, especially how rough your life is going right now. But by giving back to the universe, even when we feel overwhelmed and out of control, we are rewarded in time.
Yes i have a crappy desease that affects my life, but you know what, so many people have is so much worse then me.
SO here is a big HAPPY MOTHERS DAY FROM ME AND THE PUPPY>
[IMG]http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v29/crossracer/2011-04-02171614.jpg[/IMG]
"If Life Gives You Lemons, Make Lemonade"
"It isn't my fault that i am BiPolar, It is my responsibility how i treat it so that i don't hurt others or myself." Happy Bill
Meds. Respirdal 0.5 a day, more if needed.
I treat all my friends that are mom's on Mother's Day. Some of them have no one else who cares! I enjoy it more than hope for a token for myself.
Bipolar Disorder Forum Moderator
Bipolar 1, Borderline Personality Disorder, Panic Disorder, PCOS (hormone disorder).
Lamictal 200 mg, Seroquel XR 550 mg, Lithium 1,200 mg, Klonopin 1.5 mg as needed.
Insurance lapsed: temporarily on Seroquel XR 500 mg, Lithium 600 mg.
Bipolar Disorder Forum Moderator
Bipolar 1, Borderline Personality Disorder, Panic Disorder, PCOS (hormone disorder).
Lamictal 200 mg, Seroquel XR 550 mg, Lithium 1,200 mg, Klonopin 1.5 mg as needed.
Insurance lapsed: temporarily on Seroquel XR 500 mg, Lithium 600 mg.
Aw thanks you guys...such wisdom and love I learn from you. I'm afraid I had a meltdown around four pm and I became a loudly sobbing, hiccuping 5 year old. But I just let it out and allowed the tears to fall. My sweet hubby called me from outside and mimicked my son calling me and wishing me a happy Mother's day. It was so cute and funny. He is like that...that's why I love him...he makes me laugh! I stopped bawling and he felt good enough to take a ride. We went shopping at target for a plunger and michaels for some art paper and fryers for a phone case. I wanted a stuffed toy because someone brought him a green frog in the hospital and I was subconsciously jealous that I was the caregiver and no one gave me a present. So I bought a little wallet with an elephant on it and we had a yummy sandwich. Then my oldest texted me and soon after the youngest did also. I think the older one texted the younger one and told him to call! The younger one is kind of mad at me right now because he had a drug problem, was dealing, wrecked the car, we sent him to two detoxes and he refused meetings, quit his job and college so,we said we had to take away the car and he said, no, he was moving out...at 18! He got stabbed and wound up in jail and bolted before his sentence and took a bus to ga...and somehow it is all my fault. But I love my kids unconditionally...I can't help it.
I am not too good,at being my own best friend. I asked four different friends to hang out with me and they were all busy. I did visit my sick friend and we talked for ten min. but she had to go. The meltdown happened when I invited this other friend to lunch and her excuse was she was doing laundry! Well!
It turned out to be a good day. I don't know why it was so hard this year. I miss my sons a lot. Hubby on Valium, Percocet, lortabs, dalodid and the worse one is steroids...makes him riled up. We had a fight and then started the day over.
I hope you all had a beautiful day. I cycled a lot. I am worn out. I wrote a lot of poems in the truck while we parked. They are dismal but kinda cool. Writing pulls the bad seeds outta me.
Thanks for your support and writing me back. Just wish I could fix my family and everyone love each other again...wish I could change the past but I have no control over other people's choices and sometimes...not a lot over my own!
Love to all!!!
I am not too good,at being my own best friend. I asked four different friends to hang out with me and they were all busy. I did visit my sick friend and we talked for ten min. but she had to go. The meltdown happened when I invited this other friend to lunch and her excuse was she was doing laundry! Well!
It turned out to be a good day. I don't know why it was so hard this year. I miss my sons a lot. Hubby on Valium, Percocet, lortabs, dalodid and the worse one is steroids...makes him riled up. We had a fight and then started the day over.
I hope you all had a beautiful day. I cycled a lot. I am worn out. I wrote a lot of poems in the truck while we parked. They are dismal but kinda cool. Writing pulls the bad seeds outta me.
Thanks for your support and writing me back. Just wish I could fix my family and everyone love each other again...wish I could change the past but I have no control over other people's choices and sometimes...not a lot over my own!
Love to all!!!
Post Edited (red lightening) : 5/13/2012 9:54:44 PM (GMT-6)