Hi, I haven't been here in many years but find myself in need....surprising the hell outta me. I'm 65 and retired, off meds for depression and bipolar disorder for over a decade. Spent many years in therapy, building a strong enough tool kit to keep me sane. I finally retired in 23 to some acres in the bush, my dream since a teen. Here in northern Ontario, the winters are harsh and long and I'm finding myself falling inward. The old pathways to self-doubt and criticism yawning open. But right now, loneliness and depression are bearing down.
I know tomorrow's another day. I know that I'm not perfect but in all the world, there's no one better at being me, than Me. I know I'm worthy but it sure as crap don't feel like it. The only thing keeping me here are my 2 dogs. If not for them...
If this post disturbs, I'm sorry....I have nowhere else and no one else to vent to.
B
Yes, it has a way of creeping up on you... I also retired in '23 (or rather my company retired me, not quite of my own volition) and am looking to move somewhere remote enough. It's great if you already have your own place with some acreage. Sorry I can't be of more help, but at least we're in sort of the same boat.
SWM
MDD+PDD
SWM
MDD+PDD
Hi there,
Have you ever tried a light box? That may help you through the rest of the winter.
Long winters and not enough sunlight can affect us in negative ways,
Hugs, Karen...
Moderator-Depression
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies, diabetes (type 2), breast cancer 2021
Have you ever tried a light box? That may help you through the rest of the winter.
Long winters and not enough sunlight can affect us in negative ways,
Hugs, Karen...
Moderator-Depression
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression, allergies, diabetes (type 2), breast cancer 2021
I'm a bipolar and a depressive, also. But I'm not manic or depressed right now.
I know, that's shocking. How could that be? Maybe it's because I take an antidepresant (Mirtazapine) and a stablizer (Lithium).
I know you haven't heard about it because they were invented only about 75 years ago. What they do is, yeah, let me try to explain this, is, Brian, I can call you Brian, is these pills make you undepressed and unmanic. I know, it's hard to undeerstand, I don't understand it, either.
I just take the pills. And I'm older than you are. And here's the hard part to understand, when I take the pills, I'm no longer depressed or manic. Isn't that amazing?
Who gave me the pills, my psychiatrist through my druggist. What is a psychiatrist? OK, you have doctors who deal with physical problems, but psychiatrists deal with mental problems. Isn't that the most amzing thing you've ever heard of? And if you go to one, here's the hard part, and you tell them, I'm depressed and maniic, they'll give you pills for that. That's a shocker. Am I going too fast for you?
OK, here's one. You're 65. If you get high blood pressure, and you don't take a pill for it.... No, I'm not going there. I'll give you a week if you have high blood pressure and you don't take your pills for that. Eight days tops.
You're listing all these problems and looking around for the person who's causing them. That person is closer than you think, in my view.
Moving further into isolation into a colder climate isn't going to help anything, in my view.
I know, that's shocking. How could that be? Maybe it's because I take an antidepresant (Mirtazapine) and a stablizer (Lithium).
I know you haven't heard about it because they were invented only about 75 years ago. What they do is, yeah, let me try to explain this, is, Brian, I can call you Brian, is these pills make you undepressed and unmanic. I know, it's hard to undeerstand, I don't understand it, either.
I just take the pills. And I'm older than you are. And here's the hard part to understand, when I take the pills, I'm no longer depressed or manic. Isn't that amazing?
Who gave me the pills, my psychiatrist through my druggist. What is a psychiatrist? OK, you have doctors who deal with physical problems, but psychiatrists deal with mental problems. Isn't that the most amzing thing you've ever heard of? And if you go to one, here's the hard part, and you tell them, I'm depressed and maniic, they'll give you pills for that. That's a shocker. Am I going too fast for you?
OK, here's one. You're 65. If you get high blood pressure, and you don't take a pill for it.... No, I'm not going there. I'll give you a week if you have high blood pressure and you don't take your pills for that. Eight days tops.
You're listing all these problems and looking around for the person who's causing them. That person is closer than you think, in my view.
Moving further into isolation into a colder climate isn't going to help anything, in my view.
1. "If you want something you’ve never had then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done."
2. "Problems cannot be solved with the same mind set that created them.”
― Albert Einstein
3. “Where there’s hope, there’s life. It fills us with fresh courage and makes us strong again.”
—Anne Frank, The Diary of Anne Frank
# # #
You say: "Hi, I haven't been here in many years but find myself in need"
And, "I'm 65 and retired, off meds for depression and bipolar disorder for over a decade"
And, "Here in northern Ontario, the winters are harsh and long and I'm finding myself falling inward. The old pathways to self-doubt and criticism yawning open. But right now, loneliness and depression are bearing down."
"I know I'm worthy but it sure as crap don't feel like it."
I think if they could have put Anne Frank where you are that she would have survived. The only thmg is they carried Anne Framk off to Auswitzh and you know how much trouble that was. You know, good attitude, "I still believe in the goodness of man" and all of that.
You know, again, good attitude, but then Anne wasn't sick like we are, with our being bipolar and all of that. Right, sick. But they do have medicines for that, which psychiatrists know about and cam give to us and get us out of our doldrums and all of that, out of our mainia. All we have to do is go to one and take the medicine. And then we can read about wonderfujl people, like Anne Frank for insance. And see movies about them on TV.
But Anne Frank wasn't tought like we are. Aw, no. Pancy. Liked girl things. Probably played with dolls. Cried. Liked to color. I'll bet she even kept a diary. Talked about her feelings. Can yoiu imagine. Feelings, like who cares?
But guys can do tough things, like call their doctor. Both psychiatrist and general practitioneer, the ladder who can test us senior citizens for blood pressure and maybe give us life saving medicine like blood pressure pills. Yeah, put us guys under duress and we can come through. Not like those silly girls.
Linda Ronstadt had an album called, "Within the Sound of My Voice."
2. "Problems cannot be solved with the same mind set that created them.”
― Albert Einstein
3. “Where there’s hope, there’s life. It fills us with fresh courage and makes us strong again.”
—Anne Frank, The Diary of Anne Frank
# # #
You say: "Hi, I haven't been here in many years but find myself in need"
And, "I'm 65 and retired, off meds for depression and bipolar disorder for over a decade"
And, "Here in northern Ontario, the winters are harsh and long and I'm finding myself falling inward. The old pathways to self-doubt and criticism yawning open. But right now, loneliness and depression are bearing down."
"I know I'm worthy but it sure as crap don't feel like it."
I think if they could have put Anne Frank where you are that she would have survived. The only thmg is they carried Anne Framk off to Auswitzh and you know how much trouble that was. You know, good attitude, "I still believe in the goodness of man" and all of that.
You know, again, good attitude, but then Anne wasn't sick like we are, with our being bipolar and all of that. Right, sick. But they do have medicines for that, which psychiatrists know about and cam give to us and get us out of our doldrums and all of that, out of our mainia. All we have to do is go to one and take the medicine. And then we can read about wonderfujl people, like Anne Frank for insance. And see movies about them on TV.
But Anne Frank wasn't tought like we are. Aw, no. Pancy. Liked girl things. Probably played with dolls. Cried. Liked to color. I'll bet she even kept a diary. Talked about her feelings. Can yoiu imagine. Feelings, like who cares?
But guys can do tough things, like call their doctor. Both psychiatrist and general practitioneer, the ladder who can test us senior citizens for blood pressure and maybe give us life saving medicine like blood pressure pills. Yeah, put us guys under duress and we can come through. Not like those silly girls.
Linda Ronstadt had an album called, "Within the Sound of My Voice."